“First Dance”: The Story Behind the Song – Jereme and Selwa Lukoskie

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Listen to “First Dance”:

Jereme Lukoskie and Selwa Babaa met in the summer of 2008. They worked together at Mickey and Mooch, an upscale restaurant in Huntersville, North Carolina. Though they were dating other people at the time, there was an unspoken attraction in the air that was admitted one night during a birthday celebration. Later, Jereme would tell Selwa that he knew from the first moment he saw her that there was “something there.” He knew, early on, before they had even exchanged words, that they would be together one day. One night, a few months into their relationship, they went out for a few martinis, and she worked up the “liquid courage” to tell Jereme she loved him.

Do you remember the first time I told you that I loved you?
It wasn’t because I’d had a few.
Do you remember the first time you saw me and you knew
This would last a lifetime?

Wedding Arch

Selwa and Jereme spent nearly three years together before he proposed. Thanks, in part, to his extremely high level of patience, and her instincts that told her not to run away as she had in the past, they overcame a lot in those three years.

Oh, look how far we’ve come
And we’ve only just begun.

But it was more than his patience and her “stick-tuitive-ness” that brought them through. Their story involves a God that is bigger than them both. They realize, more and more every day, that trusting Him to carry them, rather than relying on their own “wings,” is the way to fly.

Together, you and I
Together, we will fly
We don’t need any wings cause the Wind is gonna carry us high.

Wedding Walking Path

Trust is hard, especially when it’s broken. Everyone has a skeleton or two in his closet. Selwa probably had at least 200 before she met Jereme. One day she confided in him; she told him a secret that probably should have been revealed at the beginning of their relationship, but fearing that he would run, she held it inside. When she finally got the courage to tell him, he put himself in her shoes, forgave her for keeping it a secret, and decided to stand by her side and love her through all of her flaws.

Do you remember the first time I told you that big secret?
Well how could you forget?
You could have walked away, but you chose to walk inside my shoes instead.

That kind of love is a picture of God’s love for his children. It’s the kind of love that forgives. It’s the kind of love that says, “I’m proud of you,” even when you fall. It’s the kind of love that comes down to where you are, puts on your shoes, picks you up, and carries you in its arms. It’s the kind of love Paul talks about in Ephesians 5: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her….” By the same token, “the wife must respect her husband.” We are not perfect. Selwa doesn’t always “feel loved” by Jereme. Sometimes they fight. Sometimes hurtful words come flying forth from all sides. And Jereme doesn’t always “feel respected” by Selwa. But they both know that every effort they make in their marriage is enabled by the grace of their Father.

I promise to honor you always
Even when it feels like I don’t have your love
Cause we both know every effort we make is made stronger
With grace from above.

When Selwa wrote this song, she originally intended to sing it live at their wedding reception. Thinking she might be too emotional to get through it without tears, she decided, instead, to surprise him with it during their first wedding dance as husband and wife. Though they were both too nervous to cry that day, the last line almost brought a tear to his eye.

Do you remember the first time you saw me and you… just… knew?

Wedding First Dance

Selwa wrote the song before they even got engaged. Somehow, deep down, she, too, “just… knew” they’d be together for life.

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